Why is it that most of us spend our entire lives trying to experience our worth, keep it and prove it to others?
Could it be that our concept and experience of worthiness has gotten lost in the preconception and “misbelievings” that we are not good enough unless we offer value through our deeds, actions and/or our aesthetic appeal?
At the core of all issues, lies the same demon. He looks different and may act different but underneath his many cloaks, unworthiness lies and the more we try to get rid of him or try to prove him wrong, the more persistent he becomes – making his home in our soul. He grows stronger and more demanding the more we believe in him and the less we believe in ourselves. He drives us; and drives us crazy because before we know it our entire lives are dedicated to overcoming our unworthiness by trying to prove our worth.
This demon called unworthiness runs our lives making us cringe and hide; never allowing the world to see us because then they might see that we really are unworthy underneath it all.
How can we ever know and experience our organic, unconditional and intrinsic worthiness, when we are constantly trying to prove that we are not unworthy?
As long as you are trying to prove anything, you will never know or even experience it. It is only in the true surrender that you can begin to know the thing that you are trying to prove.
When you surrender to the fear of unworthiness or not being enough, and experience yourself as unworthy, your made up paradigm of worthiness is broken open and expanded; in so doing, you open yourself up to have a direct experience of spiritual and unconditional worthiness in the eyes and heart of the creator; this evolution of worthiness can only be experienced once you give up trying to prove that you are worthy and surrender into the magnetic pull of unworthiness, where you are transformed and suddenly able to experience and comprehend a higher vibration of worth that is more aligned with the Divine Creators definition of worthiness.
In this context, there is no such thing as worthy or not worthy; and so there is nothing to prove. You are free. In this realignment with a higher frequency of worthiness a knowing is born inside you that shows you that we are all intrinsically perfect and worthy beings.
Our worthiness is not conditioned on anyone or anything. It just is; and therefore can not be taken away, given or proven – it is integrated within us through the fabric of creation. So that even in unworthiness, we are no less worthy. It doesn’t matter if we are worthy or not worthy in the context of reality because we are worthy beyond reality, where the concept of worth does not exist.
In the resistance to our unworthiness we experience ourselves as unworthy; because in order to resist anything, we must believe that we are that; and so we are.
In all the years I’ve been working with people, I’ve discovered that the thing that almost everyone fears at the core of their being is that they are unworthy or not good enough; underneath that is always a fear of being alone and disappearing from existence. “If I’m not good enough, I’ll be alone and if I’m alone, I will disappear.” This is worse than death and what everyone is unconsciously running from.
These fears unconsciously control most lives and keep people locked in a cycle of trying to prove their worth in order to “exist”. The problem is that it is impossible to prove that you are enough or that you are worthy. The other problem is that what you are looking for always lies within the very thing that you are running from.
When you understand the unconscious dynamics behind this, you easily see that this strategy of running from unworthiness, being alone or not existing doesn’t work and sets you up for pain.
Ironically, it is the pain that will eventually lead you to freedom. When the pain becomes great enough and we “give up” trying to prove something, we drop into this place where it is o.k to be unworthy and not good enough, and the pressure to prove anything to anyone (even ourselves) is off.
When we allow ourselves to fall into the fear of being alone or disappearing, ironically what we discover is ourselves. Suddenly, we experience the peace we have been seeking. We are free to live our lives from our hearts. Finally, we understand that the very thing in which we have been running from is the space where we find ourselves.
Instead of disappearing, we reconnect to the core and essence of who we really are. From this space, everything changes. Once you are no longer trying to prove your worth or that we are good enough, your story disappears.